Dictator

Dictator is the smallest of the abuse-of-power drinking card games. Where Asshole needs a whole hand of cards to sort out who is in charge, Dictator settles it with a single draw, hands one player the deck and the rules, and lets them decide who drinks for the next two minutes. Then the chair moves left and the next player gets their turn at it.

What you need

• A standard 52-card deck
• A drink for every player
• Somewhere to sit in a circle, so “pass to the left” means something
• 3 to 10 players

Setup

1. Shuffle the deck and fan it face down. The dealer does not matter; the deck goes to whoever wins the draw.
2. Everyone draws one card. Highest card is the dictator, Ace high, suits irrelevant. Tied players draw again.
3. Put the drawn cards back and reshuffle. The dictator takes the deck. Everyone else waits to hear what counts.

How to play Dictator

1. The dictator announces the conditions for the round. One condition is fine, three is a lot. Each condition names a set of cards and how many drinks each card is worth, for example “red cards drink once, Aces drink twice”.
2. The dictator deals a hand to every player, including themselves. Any number of cards, but try to keep it at 5 or fewer per player. Deal face down; players pick up and check.
3. Players count their matching cards and drink once per match. Conditions stack, so the Ace of hearts under the example above drinks three times: once for red, twice for Ace.
4. The dictator gives their matches away instead of drinking. Each matching card in the dictator’s hand is one drink to hand to any player. Spread them around or pile them on one person; that is the dictator’s business.
5. Number conditions use Jack 11, Queen 12, King 13, Ace 14. So “odd cards” includes Jacks and Kings, and “above 10” is every face card and the Ace. Say this out loud before the first round and it never comes up again.
6. Collect the cards, reshuffle, and pass the deck to the left. The next player is the dictator. Go round the table at least once so everyone gets a turn in the chair.

Condition table

Some conditions that work, roughly in order of how many drinks they produce with 5 cards each. Combine two for a bigger round.

Condition	Cards that match	Drinks per hand of 5 (about)
Red cards	26 of 52	2 to 3
Even cards	2, 4, 6, 8, 10, Queen, Ace	2 to 3
Above 7	8 through Ace	2 to 3
One suit	13 of 52	1 to 2
Face cards	Jack, Queen, King	1
A single value	4 of 52	0 to 1
Prime numbers	2, 3, 5, 7, Jack, King	2

Variations and house rules

• Redraw every round. Instead of passing left, everyone draws for the chair again after each round. The same person can be dictator three times running, which is either the best or the worst part depending on who it is.
• Standing rule. At the end of their round, the dictator sets one rule that stays in force for the rest of the game (no pointing, drink with your left hand, address the dictator as “Your Excellency”). Breaking it is a drink. After four dictators the table is running on four rules at once.
• Decrees beyond the cards. The dictator can add a condition that has nothing to do with cards: anyone wearing black drinks once, anyone who checked their phone this round drinks twice. This is the whole rationale of being a dictator, and the old rules listed it as the main variation.
• Coup. If the dictator deals more than 5 cards each, or sets conditions that hit nobody at the table, they have lost the room. The dictator drinks 3, and the deck passes left immediately.
• Dealt face up. Hands go face up so everyone can see the damage as it is counted. Slower, but it stops the quiet player in the corner quietly forgetting their third red card.
• Last card dictator. The last card dealt to each player is a drink for the dictator if it matches. Softens the chair a little for tables where the dictator is getting too comfortable. Our house rule, not a traditional one.
• Two-player Dictator. Works, just barely. Deal 7 cards each and alternate the chair. It turns into a dice game with extra steps, and Higher or Lower is better for two.

Tips

• Pick conditions that hit the people you want and miss the ones you do not. “Spades drink once” is a lottery; “red face cards drink twice” is a scalpel, and the dictator is the only one who knows which they are using.
• Deal 3 cards, not 5, when the conditions are broad. Red cards plus even cards with 5 cards each is 5 to 6 drinks a head every round, and the round takes one minute.
• Give the dictator’s drinks to whoever has had the fewest that round, at least sometimes. The game has no built-in limit, and a table that keeps stacking three conditions on one player is the quickest way to end the night early for them. One condition per round is plenty for a long game.
• Reshuffle properly between rounds. Conditions like “above 7” are sensitive to clumps, and a lazy shuffle hands someone five Kings twice running.